Two Thousand Twelve

The Universe blessed me with some very important people.

I went to NYC with my class of insanely talented lovelies.

Then after that exhausting trip, turned right around and spent St. Patrick's Day in Memphis with my very best friends.

Loralyn visited me in St. Louie!

I said goodbye to my Mimi.

My last MWTA

My Last Seminar

I Stage Managed a beautiful show of Lady Windermere's Fan with a group of amazing people

I discovered beeritas

I got a BFA! (with honors!)

I said goodbye to my best friends

I rocked it hard at LTOTS with two amazing ladies and a company of fantastic people.

Visited picturesque Holland, MI!

I rediscovered my love for reading!!

I moved into my first apartment!

Got a pen pal and a friend back.

Saw the Circus!!

Saw some beautiful nature. Felt blessed and was reminded how incredible this world really is.

I never stopped missing Vienna.

I started my first professional SM gig at the Imaginary Theatre Company.

Equity!!

And I couldn't be happier!!

I've had ups and downs and hard goodbyes. I've met some amazing people and there were so many memories made. This is my first year not in school - my first year on my own and I feel so blessed to have my friends and family beside me as we go through this crazy thing called life.

Day 12

I'm thankful for the love of a beautiful puppy.

Freckles.

Day 11

11:11s and shooting stars.

I'm thankful for a sense of greatness somewhere in the vast expanse that is our universe. And I'm thankful that there is something out there to believe in. To wish on. To dream. Because I think that I'll always want something more from my life, from myself. And I think that it's okay to not be satisfied with life - to want more out of it, to demand it give you what you always want, and bargain with hard work and ambition and a little bit of luck.

Day 4 - Adventure

I'm thankful for the opportunities I've had to travel. To have adventures and to explore.

There are so many experiences yet to be had and sights to see and things to learn. Every day I am thankful that I started my exploring in Belgium 7 years ago. That trip gave me my first taste of wanderlust.
I am thankful that I had the opportunity to study abroad and have an amazing three months with my best friend and make wonderful new friends and meet Kathleen and travel anywhere my heart desired. I had crazy awesome adventures and saw some truly amazing things. And in my heart now there lies and insatiable desire to have another adventure. And soon. And I can finally make it happen.

Day 3 - These Things

Source: cualacin0.tumblr.com via Natalie on Pinterest

30 Days of Thanks Giving

30 Days of Thanks Giving. Giving Thanks.

To the Universe, to the late night decisions that turned into the best paths, to anything and everything that made me who I am and gave me things to be thankful for.

1. I LOVE my job. I love it. To me, there is nothing in the world more rewarding than the smiles of children who have just been captured by theatrical magic. They're grinning from ear to ear. Their jaws are dropped open at this thing that they've just experienced. They are using their imagination. They don't know exactly what they've seen, but it's awesome, it's cool, it's really neat and it just happened right in front of them!! For a while, they are in this magical world of theatre. Who knows if they'll remember it years from now. But they've seen it. They've embraced it, they've dived in, no questions asked, completely accepting that we are now in a magical forest where giant birds talk to you or near a quiet old farmhouse where gnomes really exist! Theatre for Young Audiences is more than my job. It's my passion and I'm so thankful to be able to do what I love.

2. My parents have always supported me, always loved me, and always encouraged me. When I said I wanted to do theatre for the rest of my life, they never said, "No, that's ridiculous." or "You'll never make enough money to support yourself." or "What about a real job?" They told me that whatever I wanted to do was fine and helped me get to where I wanted to be. They taught me right and wrong and respect and how to see the world. They taught me to trust people and to love everyone. They instilled values in me and I hope I've made them proud with my work and who I am. I love them to the moon and back and I miss them constantly and look forward to seeing whenever I can.

Okay.

Truth is,

You make me crazy.


There. I said it.

You drive me nuts. You are obnoxious and sometimes I can't stand you.
Sometimes your stupid grin drives me up a wall and sometimes when you ask me a question you already know the answer to, I want to scream.

And a lot of the time, I hate when you talk about work. But I love those moments too, cause your eyes light up and you get kinda lost in this thing that you love so much. You get this smile on your face and I don't even follow what you're talking about anymore-you've gone way over my head-but it's okay because I just like watching you get so passionate about it. A lot of the time, I like talking to you. And I like listening to you.

Truth is, I miss you when I'm not with you and that scares the hell out of me.
Truth is, you give me butterflies and I hate that sometimes you make me nervous.

There. I said it.

Dream a Little Dream of Me

629 days

1 year, 8 months, and 20 days

Not a day goes by that I don't miss this place. This city. This way of life.

How could a city have captured my heart so immensely, so completely, so intensely in such a short amount of time?

In 121 days, I fell wholly, crazily, madly in love with everything about Vienna.

121 days, and a lifetime of memories and experiences.

Until the next great adventure.

I Just Might

I just might be stronger than I know. Well I might really be surprised.

Dolly's words are hitting me hard tonight.

I just finished a letter to a dear friend. Well, what used to be a dear friend. Times change, people grow apart. We disagree and we fight and we let go of relationships that were so important to us at one point.

But the thing that can set apart a true friendship is how to build the bridge to reconnect.

We used to write letters. She was my Big Apple Pen Pal to my Viennese letters. She answered every one diligently and excitedly. I'll be the first to admit I'm jealous of her way with words--the way they seem to come from her so easily and so beautifully. But it's just one of the things I admired about her.

We had our disagreements. Our rough spots. I didn't support her as I should have a classmate. A comrade. A cohort, even, on a fun night. We put our differences in the spotlight. We made them the center of our connection and then the other things fell away. The way we both loved books. The way we loved writing and reading and Vienna and chocolate and Smirnoff and pretty fonts.

We lost all those connections when we began to focus on the disconnect that was happening.

And I'm letting go. Apologies and all. I'm putting the letter in the mail tomorrow before work, and my greatest hope is that it reaches her before she leaves her summer job and my courage to say I'm sorry is gone for another long while.